Life Goes On.....

Death is nothing at all.
I have only slipped away to the next room.
I am I and you are you.
Whatever we were to each other,
That, we still are.

Call me by my old familiar name.
Speak to me in the easy way
which you always used.
Put no difference into your tone.
Wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow.

Laugh as we always laughed
at the little jokes we enjoyed together.
Play, smile, think of me. Pray for me.
Let my name be ever the household word
that it always was.
Let it be spoken without effect.
Without the trace of a shadow on it.

Life means all that it ever meant.
It is the same that it ever was.
There is absolute unbroken continuity.
Why should I be out of mind
because I am out of sight?

I am but waiting for you.
For an interval.
Somewhere. Very near.
Just around the corner.

All is well.

Funeral Death Poem by Henry Scott Holland ~ 1847-1918
Canon of St. Paul's Cathedral ~ London. UK

My maternal grandfather slipped away on Wednesday evening surrounded by his family. In my heart of hearts, I knew it was coming but it still doesn't ease the grief and pain I have currently embedded in my heart. My comfort is that he's finally reunited with my grandmother and that he isn't suffering anymore...

It's strange, I don't cry in front of my family regarding this matter, but here I am, tears blurring my vision as I attempt to type this lame excuse of a blog post explaining my circumstances. Perhaps, I'm saying things that ought to be private but I just need to let it out in some way. I guess as the eldest grandchild and with my mom's random and constant bursts of tears, I have to stay strong even if my smiles are fake and I chatter away like nothing is wrong....

I've been through worse things.... I can get through this.....

(I have a couple of scheduled posts coming soon... but I probably need some time to just be alone... or maybe I don't and I'll be back next week writing about the most mundane and bimbotic things again, I don't know.... whatever it is... I'll be back.. I just don't know when....)


Diamond Crevasse (May'n) from Macross Frontier
Humming this song silently in my head has been strangely comforting during the whole process thus far, perhaps because the lyrics resonates what I'm feeling at the moment.